The GOP’s latest budget resolution proposes to increase the national debt by nearly $1 trillion per year, every year, over the next 10 nears. So I was curious. What could one buy with ONE TRILLION DOLLARS? Here are some of the more interesting answers I found…
– Every sports team. All of them. NFL, MLB, NBA, NHL, and NASCAR, and still have plenty left over for beer and nachos.
– A new home, new car? How about five million new homes. Or forty million new cars.
– Need a new phone or laptop? Fuck it, buy Apple. Yes, the entire company, and put the remaining $200 billion on an iTunes gift card.
– You could fund an entire war. Think of the naming rights… Curtis Wiggins presents: The War in Iraq. A Curtis Wiggins Production.
– One copy of the Office, complete series, on DVD, for every single person on the planet. No one would ever have an excuse to not get your references ever again.
– Want to take a cruise? Hell take all of them. You could buy a thousand cruise ships.
– Prefer to drive? You could pave the entire US Interstate Highway System in 24K gold leaf. I mean really, why subject your forty million cars to mere concrete and asphalt.
– Remember that song “I’d like to buy the world a Coke…” You could literally do that. With refills.
– Hungry? You could buy every McDonald’s on the planet. And every Burger King. Have it your way, indeed.
– And here’s the weirdest one I found. You could buy a free funeral and lifetime supply of eggs for everyone living in poverty in America. I’m not sure what this guy’s plan was exactly, but I think he wants to kill off all the poor people by way of high cholesterol…